Thursday, September 07, 2006

Nothing But Possibilities

I am borrowing the title of my handsome husband's blog for this post. We were talking the other day how it is at once both hopeful and dismal. Being an eternal optimist, I had never thought of the dismal aspect of the phrase. You can look forward and see that life is full of possibilities, but if you never act and do your part, then that is all that your life will be. The possibilities will never amount to anything on their own.

Lately I have been reflecting on my life as it is now, as it has been in the past, and I have especially been looking forward to what I see for its future. Greatness is the word that comes to mind. :) No, what I really feel is that I am thankful for what I have been able to do and I am sad for what I have not.

With hindsight, it is easy to see the amazing opportunities that I have had - some of them I've seized upon and others I have allowed to lay by the wayside. The thing that is not so easy is to have the foresight to recognize each opportunity as it arises and know (or at least trust) where it will take you if you embrace it. I was laughing when I signed up for e-harmony. I giggled every time I thought about it. Little did I know that in just a year and a half from that time, I would marry a man that I met on that site, move across the country with him, move back across the country and have our first child. I know I bring it up a lot, but really, it amazes me every time I think about it! Who knew?! Well, we know Who knew. And that's who we have to rely on to guide us.

So, what about the future? I have accomplished some of my greatest goals, but there are so many still on my list. I think that I am a great person, but I have not achieved my full potential. That's why we're all still here, right? I am going back to school to finish my degree. That's a good accomplishment, but it's what I want to DO with my degree that I get really excited about. I want to make a real difference in the world...and I think that means making a difference in a few lives. I will start with my husband, my children, my family, myself and I will branch out from there.

I love my son. I love him with a mother's heart and a mother's love...something I am only able to understand now that I have my own child. Tyler and I are able to provide for him and give him our full attention and our time and as much love as he'll ever need. I am so grateful for that! And no matter how many children we have, I know that we will have enough love, time and attention...and to spare!

It has made me think more and more, though, of the millions of children born to parents who are absent - either emotionally or physically. These babies and children and teenagers do not have the love, attention, or physical care that they need to make it in the world. They are abused, neglected, and many are given very little thought by the world. Nobody expects greatness from them - few people expect anything from them. That knowledge broke my heart before, but nothing like it does now that I am a mom myself. I have thought about these little people for a long time. My family doing foster care opened my eyes to a very sad world. I didn't know that things like that could really happen. There is so much that needs to be done about it! And I cannot, in good conscience, sit back and be grateful for all that we have without giving back.






So that's what I am going to do. Find Heavenly Father's broken and forgotten children and try to give them enough love, attention, time and ability to make it in the world. How am I going to do that, you ask? I am going to be a Social Worker, I am going to be a therapist, I am going to open a non-profit organization to help abused and neglected teens... I don't really know, actually. I just know that is one of my goals and one of my "callings". I will get my degree and then get to work once I have raised my own family. I know that just like the prompting came to pay the $39.99 and sign up for e-harmony, the promptings and opportunities will come to help these special little people. Life opens up for us in unexpected ways; we just have to be ready and willing!

I have been given a life full of possibilities - I think every child deserves that.